What is love?

Warning: this may come out jumbled and confusing, but it's been on my mind today...

 Alex and I were talking the other day about love, and it seems to us that the concept has become misunderstood and the word is tossed around very easily. Maybe I have gotten the wrong impression, but from what I have picked up "love" is now often used in place of "lust".  I don't understand how it's possible to love someone when all you know about them is how they look, I don't know how you could truly love someone and yet still insist on having what you want over what they want or what is best for them on a regular basis, I don't know how you could love someone and still do something that you know will hurt them either physically or emotionally, or how you could love someone and be willing to use them and toss them aside.

 I didn't realize I had come to love Alex because I started getting butterflies in my tummy when I saw him, or because I was attracted to his smile and how he sounded when he laughed, not even when I started thinking about him all during the day and the best parts of my weeks were when he came over to hang out. I realized that what I was feeling was love when I wanted what was best for him, even if it meant I would never see him again. The idea of never seeing him again made me feel heartbroken, but I knew it would be worth it to me if I knew he was happy. I realized I loved him when I became so deeply affected by what he was feeling or how people treated him. I wanted to be able to take all the hurt and pain away even if it meant going through it myself.

 I have never doubted Alex's love for me, and not because he says the words "I love you." to me every day (though I would be lying if I said that the words don't matter) I know he loves me because of how he treats me, because of his willingness to help me be the best I can be, because of the times he gives up what he wants to cater to my wants, and, yes, even because of the times when he tells me I'm being foolish or that I need to change my attitude.

  I'm not saying that if it's truly love then physical appearances and emotional highs when the other person is around won't play a part. I'm not saying that if you love someone you will never hurt them, because people make mistakes and do hurtful things without realizing it. I'm not trying to say that if you love someone that you'll never get what you want because you're always catering to them. Partially because you will want what they want, and partly because if it's a mutual love they'll want what you want...thus having give and take on both sides. (That can become a whole other topic though)

I'm also not claiming to be an expert on the matter myself, but I get my information from the source that really matters, the one place that I know to be Truth. The Bible.

1Corinthians 13:1-8, and 13 sum it up rather clearly!
"If I speak in the tongues of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast, but do not have love, I gain nothing. Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails...And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love."
  
I know that some of these verses are well-known and often put on plaques and wall-hangings. But have you stopped lately to just think about what it really says?